BroBlog: Almost Done
I have no idea how much longer I’m gonna be forced to continue dragging my body outta bed at 7 in the morning time, but I do know that it’s not too much longer. Freshman year; excited about being out of middle school, scared of getting hazed. Everybody seems so chill and enormous. No more [...]
BroBlog: The Sloth
Tony Slothower, the most bro teacher to have ever graced the halls of Central. This fist bumping, racecar driving, Hot Wheel collecting brohemian is by far the chillest brofessor to have ever lived. Like a super chill Batman, “The Sloth” is here to snatch us up, rockin’ his flame retardant racing suit and rescue us teenage [...]
BroBlog: Slice
“Bro, can I get a slice of paper?” “Hit me with a slice of that gum, broheem” “You sliced that jump-shot royally, son” “You didn’t get your paper-work done? Slice” As a chill dude, expanding his knowledge of the Bro Dictionary, one word is prime when either hitting at a biddie for a sandwich or [...]
BroBlog: No Shave
So I spent this whole past month workin’ on perfecting my beard growing abilities. Looking like a LumBrojack choppin’ tree’s in the wilderness, I made it through all of November. I had a gripload of cash riding on my successful no-shave expedition and I showed up and made bank… why? cuz I’m on one. As [...]
BroBlog: Dirty Facebook
So I’m uploading a few pics of my family onto the Book of Faces and it’s all going smooth. My sweet unsuspecting mother is looking over my shoulder as the pics load, smiling like a super chill parental figure as each pic finishes downloading. “All done, shibby” “Shib-shibby, my mom replies” My next mouse click [...]
BroBlog: Janky Hardware
So I’m at this jazz contest, wrapped in black from head to toe, lookin steezy, and I have to play on a foreign drum set. I’m not too worried, I’ve played on other peoples drums before without any problems. I quickly swapped out the trashcan lids they had on the cymbal stands and threw on [...]
BroBlog: Corsage
So I asked a gurl from another school to her homecoming, because I’m a chill bro and was feena get my dance on. Now though, I’m in Dill-bro-pickle. Do I fork up chedda to order one of them wrist flowers or am I not expected to cuz it’s just like a chill friend thing, plus…. [...]
BroBlog: Guitar Strings
So I’m sitting in my bro’s mancave, twangin’ on his acoustic axe, which was about as in tune as T-Pain’s squawking before his tracks get mixed, and I spot a couple broken strings. We left the cave and didn’t do anything about the busted excuse of a guitar, when later that day I chatted with him about getting [...]
BroBlog: He’s a bro
The student section for the Central vs. South soccer game was tasty. Almost lost at the last second, unchill. Goal got called back like it was supposed to, real chill. Watching all the South kid’s go flaccid as they put back on the cloths they stripped off and go back to their student section, super [...]
BroBlog: If you were bad
I’m at the State Fair for band contest, like only 10 elderly bros with walkers and hearing aids were there to watch us slang music, but we put it work. If their heads weren’t strapped into their wheelchairs and their noses weren’t hooked up to breathing tubes theyda been bobbin their heads. Pretty chill.
BroBlog: ACT
Woke up early on Saturday, not chill. Dragged myself to the shower and couldn’t find my body-wash, not chill. Threw on some hiking socks and mandals, fairly chill. My pops bought me a snickers, real chill. Made it to K-Dub on time and sat by one of my bros for the ACT, real chill. Lady [...]
BroBlog: Trippin’
So I’m chillin’ in a pouch with a few bro’s (they are in individual ones, not on my lap) it’s dark out and the bag of powdered broughnuts is running low, when all of the sudden some unchill, janky-cat screeches towards us in his whip flashing his brights. Without givin’ the situation a bit to [...]
BroBlog: Sperry’s
Shiftin’ through Dill’s by the kick-stand and I spot a fresh pair of Sperry’s posted up on a showcase stand. I say to salesbro, “Ey, Bro whats the tag on this fresh pair right hur?” “Those just came out the box broseph, yet to be marked down.”
BroBlog: Close Call
Cruisin’ in my whip up the Bricks actin’ chill with a red G-rade in my hand, I slowed my roll for the obvious stop sign like a brosponsible doode, came to the three way stop sign and posted up. After waiting my turn to get onto Marymout, I crept into the street, like always, when
